I've realised that I am the kind of person that does not know how to make myself happy. I often have to ask myself "Am I happy?", I do feel like an emotion retard sometimes because how come I do not know if I am happy or not?
I admire people who are always happy, I really want to know how they do it.
I thought at my age, I have learnt all the fundamentals to be a 'good', 'normal' human being, but I think I have yet mastered the skill to be HAPPY.
Sometimes, I know that I will be unhappy when I find out the truth about something, and yet I will insist to find out the truth and get extremely upset over it. A lot of friends asked why I wanted to know the truth when I know very clearly that I will be very upset after.
Sigh... I really need to learn how to make myself happy